I haven’t posted in over a month.  No, that wasn’t exactly intentional.  And I don’t have “writer’s block”.  I even have a few posts I’ve drafted and a whole list of ideas just ready to be hashed out…but sometimes, you just have to be silent to hear.

It has been a whirlwind month for me.  For my family.

I have spent the last month seeking the heart of God in ways I’m not sure I ever have.  Especially for a specific situation.  More on that in a minute.

I have spent the last month pursuing God’s heart for my family, for myself, for all the plates I have spinning.  For one week of that month, I was EXTREMELY blessed to be able to go away from it all.  I got to spend 5 1/2 days in a cabin in the Midwestern woods serving and getting refreshed, refilled and renewed.  I cannot begin to tell you how incredible of an experience it is to be able to lay down every title, every position, every “job” and for just under a week be nothing but a daughter of the Most High.

We can read throughout the gospels that Jesus “got away” time and again.  He would go off on His own and be with the Father.  Why would we think for a moment that if Jesus needed that, that we could EVER survive without it??  If you’ve never had the opportunity to do this, check out Fellowship of the Sword and sign up for an event. It might just be the best thing you ever do.

Through this month-long process of seeking God’s heart, so much has happened.  So many things have changed.  So many dreams have shifted.  It’s funny, if I had continued at the pace I was going, I’m not sure I would have heard Him.  I’ll say it again, sometimes, you just have to be silent to hear.

Through this “silence” (I’m not sure my kids would call it that) I have heard the call into a new season of life.  It is time to let go.  To lay down a dream.  Dreams are funny things.  And oh, how they can change.  I wonder if sometimes we are so busy trying to chase or fulfill or accomplish our own dreams that we forget to stop and ask God what His dream is for our life.

All this silence and listening and praying and discerning, by both my husband and I – along with a trio of fierce praying friends sisters who love me and my people and are willing to storm the gates on our behalf – has lead us to make the decision that after over four years, we will no longer be homeschooling our boys.  Oh, how it hurts to even type that.  My shirt is soaked right now with tears of both joy and sorrow.  Not because it isn’t right, but because it is who I have been for so long.  And you can’t let go of something as big as homeschooling – even when it’s the right thing to do- without a bit of sorrow.

We are excited for this new season, and while we aren’t exactly sure why this has all worked out the way it has or the timing in which it is happening, we trust the Lord and we are confident this is the direction He is leading us.  Isaiah 55:9,12 “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts…you will go out in joy and be led forth in peace.”

And who knows, in the midst of laying down the dream of homeschooling, God may start to fan the flame of another.  God’s timing, God’s dreams, God’s ways are ALWAYS better.

Thank you Lord for your hand that leads.  Your voice that calls.  Your light that illuminates our path.  We will go out in joy and be led by peace.  We will trust Your will for us, for our family, for our dreams.  Let us dream Your dreams and follow Your plans as long as we have breath.

Are there any dreams that you need to lay down in order to realize God’s dreams for you?  Are you living so loud and fast and busy that you can’t seem to hear His voice?

Sometimes, you just have to be silent to hear…